Galactic getaway
Going zero-G with Virgin
Good morning, space cowboys. This is your Stock Market Rundown for August 16th, 2023. Thank you for joining me once again. Let’s dig in:
TODAY’S TOP STORY: SPACE BNB 🚀
How would you like to spend your next vacation boldly going where no man has gone before—or few men, anyway? Space tourism is becoming a reality, though you won’t be leaving any footprints on the moon.
Virgin Galactic, the space company founded by billionaire Richard Branson, just hit a major milestone: its first-ever private spaceflight with tourists on board. Six passengers joined the inaugural flight of the VSS Unity, a reusable rocket-powered space plane that went high enough for them to view the curvature of the earth. (Should’ve taken a pic and texted it to Kyrie Irving.)
Branson’s plans have been beset by delays—one of the passengers on this flight was an 80-year-old man who bought his $200,000 ticket in 2005. Way to hang in there, bro.
Virgin Galactic, a public company, isn’t profitable, but has nearly a billion of cash on the balance sheet—ample dry powder to forge ahead with Branson’s Star Trek fantasies. Arguably, NASA’s space program, over the course fifty years, hasn’t given us much aside from Velcro, Tang, and pens that work while you’re upside down. So why not turn space flight into a tourist attraction?
Branson plans monthly trips to the stratosphere going forward. Add a mimosa brunch to the package, and I’m in.
SO WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON?
Presidential candidate Ron DeSantis says TikTok is a “security vulnerability” and he’ll ban it if he becomes president. Look, if we’re going to ban everything that lowers IQ, we can start with White Claw and Pokemon Go.
Time to invest in that Patek you’ve been considering? Luxury watch prices are near a two-year low. High-end watches increase in value over time, providing ample rationalization for purchasing a timepiece that costs as much as a brand-new Honda Civic.
Bad news for parents with the lyrics to Frozen memorized: the price of Disney+ is going up—again. Apparently episodes of The Mandalorian, much like gasoline and cigarettes, have inelastic demand.
“Fast fashion” brands like H&M and Zara, hurt by accusations that they generate vast landfills of waste, are launching garment repair services to be more “sustainable”. Not an issue for me given my wardrobe of Costco sweatsuits, which I buy in packs of twelve.
That’s it for today, pals; see you bright and early tomorrow AM. Yours in capitalism, The Axe