Road rage
A sneak peak at GTA 6
Good morning, high-score heroes. This is your Stock Market Rundown for December 15th, 2023. Thanks for reading. Let’s get started:
TODAY’S TOP STORY: HOW TO PLAN A HEIST
Peeling down the highway in your Pegassi Zentorno while the Doobie Brothers plays on the radio, on your way to a rendezvous with a mob boss. You guessed it: it’s not real life, it’s Grand Theft Auto.
Rockstar Games was founded in 1998 as a subsidiary of public video game holding company Take-Two Interactive. The studio’s iconic franchises like Grand Theft Auto, Max Payne, and Red Dead brought action-adventure excitement to TV screens in suburban basements.
Rockstar’s innovation in gaming was pushing the limits of an “open-world” environment, where the player is immersed in an alternate reality. Grand Theft Auto, better known as GTA, became the flagship franchise, despite pearl-clutching from some observers over its violent and sometimes lascivious content.
The most recent entry in the series was GTA 5 in 2013, which has sold over 190 million copies since its release, making it the second best selling video game of all time (after Minecraft). Apparently, the mostly-male gamer audience loves causing chaos in supercars.
(The trailer wasn’t the world’s first peek at the game: in September 2022, Rockstar was the target of a “network intrusion” that leaked early footage. Guess some fans just couldn’t wait.)
Take Two’s stock actually fell slightly on the release of the trailer, as Wall Street investors were anticipating the blockbuster game would be released sooner. Patience, young padawans… you can’t rush art. Consider it something to look forward to for Christmas 2025.
SO WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON?
Elon Musk is raising $1 billion in funding for his new artificial intelligence company, whose flagship product is a dad-joke-generating chatbot called Grok. Unclear why it has a name better suited to an unfrozen caveman.
Time to raid grandma’s jewelry box? Thanks to geopolitical jitters and widespread anticipation that the Fed will cut rates in 2024, the price of gold has spiked to a new all-time high.
Hackers accessed the personal data of millions of customers of genetic testing company 23andme. Terrific, now the North Koreans can download my DNA off the Dark Web and manufacture clones in a vat.
Ray-Ban has just released smart sunglasses that let you take calls, listen to music, and snap a pic without taking out your phone. Kind of cool, but carries the risk that your fellow subway patrons will think you’re a creep for wearing glasses with a hidden camera.
That’s it for today and for the week, my friends. Have yourselves a wonderful weekend, and let’s circle back first thing Monday morning. Yours in capitalism, The Axe
Got questions? Compliments? Want to advertise in Stock Market Rundown?
Hit me up at theaxe@stockmarketrundown.co